Instead of ghosting, do this

I realized ghosting is really common during dating. I too have ghosted people after meeting them once.

Over time, I made a resolution not to do so any more. Here is why:

I feel that ghosting is not reflective of the kind of person I want to be. 

The reason why people ghost is because they lack courage to be able to difficult conversations. I want to build the skill of being able to say no and to handle conflicts well.

Ghosting is also not being considerate or respectful to others.

It disregards the other person's feelings and leaves them without an explanation. I do not want my actions to cause someone to feel confused, rejected, and hurt. I do not wish to be an inconsiderate person.

So, unless they have been rude to me, late or made inappropriate advances in some way, I will not leave them hanging.

If you also feel that ghosting is not aligned to how you want to show up and who you want to be, you can use my post first or second date template:

I shared this on threads as well:

Here are some examples of this in practice:

You can keep it general like “I feel we are not a romantic match”. This is extremely neutral and does not put the blame on anyone.

You do not have to give the real reason like “You a bit fat”.

There is no value in saying these things. It is mean and will only cause hurt.

Here is another example. In this case, I went out twice.

If you went out with someone at least 3 times already, please have the courtesy to do this in person, do not end things over text.

Avoid doing a slow fade and gradually replying lesser and lesser. This can cause others a lot of anxiety.

Being able to deal with hard conversations is not easy and requires practice.

I remind myself that if I cannot build this skill of uncomfortable conversations, I will never become successful.

The challenge I face when dating

A lot of people assume I have a lot of options because of my social media profile.

There are definitely challenges in finding the right fit.