Thank you, Ah Kong

Ah Kong passed peacefully in his sleep on Sunday morning.

For those of you who have been following me for some time, you would know that I grew up with my grandparents and stayed with them on weekdays.

Ah Kong was alive during a time in my life where I was in a stable place. I could provide monthly allowance, spend more time and organize many family activities.

One of my best memories was going back with him to his ancestral home in Xiamen.

Back then, I posted on Facebook to ask my peers if I should go on this trip.

I only had one year of working experience then, my numbers were not good and I had just returned from business trip. I was afraid of being away from office for too long.

Many advised me to go. I realized if I truly believe that family > career, then my actions should also show it. Furthermore, nothing is permanent. Death can come any time we do not expect it.

I made a wise choice of picking Ah Kong. It was definitely worth it.

We got to make many beautiful memories together, which we can keep for life.

There are so many things I admire about my Ah Kong, and I wanted to share them here as a tribute to the legacy he’s left.

1. Strong, resilient and provider mindset

My grandfather is the living embodiment of the strength and resilience that defined his generation.

His life was marked by incredible challenges — from the turmoil of the opium war and World War II to the early, uncertain years of modern Singapore’s growth.

Despite it all, he remained a steady provider. He supported not only his children and my Ah Ma but also her brother, her father, and even the extended family back in Penang.

The work conditions back then were nothing like they are today. He did not have air-conditioned offices or convenient public transport.

Instead, he’d cycle from Tiong Bahru to Tanjong Rhu regularly.

What stood out most to me was his sense of responsibility and duty - putting the needs of his wife, children and family before self.

In a world today where we hear so much about “lying flat” and “chill”, my Ah Kong’s life stands in stark contrast.

It was not about hedonism and “traveling the world”, but a relentless focus on leaving positive impact to the lives of those around him.

This type of strength, resilience and focus on others is true masculinity.

Due to his influence, I rarely find myself complaining about hard work. Compared to what his generation endured, our challenges seem smaller.

The sacrifice of previous generations gave us all the opportunities we have today. These are privileges we constantly have to earn given Singapore’s vulnerabilities. Rent is due every day.

I am determined to treasure it and continue to make the most out of what they have given to us.

2. Stepping out of comfort zone

Ah Kong’s work drove him to make many bold moves in life.

As a young man, he left Penang on his own, hoping to find a better life in Singapore.

Though Singapore became his home, his work often took him across Southeast Asia and even as far as India. He’d be out on the seas for days to provide for his family.

When he eventually left his seafaring days behind, he did not simply do nothing at home.

Instead, he took a job at McDonald’s, embracing the chance to pick up new skills and stay active well beyond the age when most would retire.

It was never too late for him to step outside his comfort zone, and he did it with remarkable humility and openness.

Inspired by him, I try to carry that same curiosity and willingness to learn from design to journalism, software sales to venture capital.

Ah Kong showed me that there’s no age or stage of life where you stop learning, growing, and finding new ways to connect with the world around you.

3. Making the most out of life

My Ah Kong lived with incredible intention, always learning and keeping his mind and body active.

Even into his later years, he cycled regularly, staying on his bike until he was 86 years old. This demonstrated to me that exercise is truly what keeps you walking well even at an old age.

He read the news every day, kept up with current events, and even picked up using a smart phone when he was in his late 80s and the Ipad in his 90s.

This active spirit runs in my family. I see it in my dad, who keeps himself engaged through photography, baking, and fitness. He discouraged me from watching television at a young age.

Inspired by both of them, I aim to be an active rather than passive participant in life.

I spend my free time on content creation, reading, learning, volunteering, and staying fit.

Ah Kong’s legacy reminds me that a purposeful, engaged life is the most rewarding way to live.

4. Discipline and consistency

Ah Kong had an incredible sense of discipline and a system for everything in his life.

Every day, he followed a fixed routine without fail. He would carefully measure his blood sugar, take his medicines, and adhere to all the protocols his doctor prescribed.

This reliability made caring for him so much easier.

His commitment to his routine also reminds us of the strength that comes from showing up every day, following through, and building habits that support our goals.

It emphasises the value of consistency and routine — a foundation for success in all areas of life.

During this time, I am grateful for my family.

My cousin cancelled his trip right away to Vietnam immediately; my younger brother stepped up to support despite being sick. Many stayed up late for night shift and to fold the papers.

Everyone came together to ensure we cover as much as we can so that the older generation can rest.

I am deeply blessed to have a close extended family who always rally around each other in tough times.

I am grateful to my friends who visited. And, my colleagues who stepped up to cover my meetings for me, and who checked in. I appreciate our customers who extended kind words to me.

The best thing I can do for my Ah Kong is to take care of our family and also ensure his values live through us.

I hope to be as present as possible for my family as we all manage the logistics of a Taoist wake and give Ah Kong a good send off.

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